BABY
BURNIE
($BABYBURNIE)
The Soviet Sleeper Baby on Solana ☭
"No naps until college. Tax the rich 100%. The plan is perfect, comrade."
7hHeHMkfnxYSMTqVNiV2WZFGz7xqhVmULJHAQcRcpump
THE PLAN IS PERFECT
Baby Burnie is a proud, unapologetic communist baby who still believes the plan is perfect. Every time he throws his rattle and demands free everything, he accidentally shows why it always ends in empty toy boxes and everyone equally crying.
"We give free milk, free diapers, free college! Just like the Soviet Union… why is everyone still poor and poopy?"
A living cultural experiment in reverse-psychology satire. The plan is perfect. The execution? Comrade, do not ask questions.
POLICY BRIEFINGS
The People's Guide to Why Everything is Going According to Plan
No Naps Until College
Sleep is bourgeois. The struggle continues at 3am.
Tax The Rich (And Their Toy Trucks)
100% tax on Hot Wheels. Redistribute to the sandbox proletariat.
Free Healthcare For All Stuffies
Mr. Bear deserves universal coverage. No stuffy left behind.
Mandatory Nap Time For Oil Trucks
Green new deal: every diesel rig gets a binky and a blanky.
Universal Basic Cookies
Two cookies per comrade per day. Crumbs equally distributed.
Free College For Toddlers
PhD by age 4. Tuition paid by the rattle tax.
DEXSCREENER
Track the people's chart, comrade. The plan is perfect.
THE BURNIE GALLERY
